Pam has asked me to share my memories and the timeline as I remember it of Tammy’s courageous fight. Recently I had the opportunity to meet Dr. Horowitz at Emory when I accompanied Bill and Linda Gentry when they presented the proceeds of the golf tournament, Tammy’s Scramble, to the Winship Foundation in her memory. They raised well over $5,000 for cervical cancer research and plan to do the same next May. It was a great event and a fun day for all. Thank you Bill and Linda!

From the first time she met Dr. Horowitz, Tammy felt God had directed her to his care. Because of a chance discussion with a client/friend here at SweetApple immediately after her diagnosis, she was able to become his patient when he did not have room in his schedule. It meant so much to her to have a doctor that truly cared about her and we heard his name constantly. After meeting him, I now understand why she felt such love for this doctor. His daughter had a difficult situation with the health of the horse and Tammy’s compassion toward his family meant so much that he just had to make room for her as a patient.

I’ll apologize now for the length of my story.

Remembering Tammy’s battle.

Tammy and David wanted a family and it wasn’t happening for them. Tammy took the day off in early February 2006 to have a procedure under anesthesia. David called me mid-day to say she would have to be out the next day because he had to make an appointment with an oncologist. My heart dropped. She wasn’t even awake yet. When Tammy returned to work knowing the devastating news of cancer, she wore that determined face we saw until the end. We tried to be strong for her, but she was the one holding us up. The doctor said an immediate hysterectomy was needed. I think this news was as devastating if not more than the diagnosis of cancer. She insisted on saving her ovaries, ever determined her life was not going to be compromised by this disease. Her surgery in March of 2006 went well and she returned to work as soon as possible. The pathology following surgery was clear and we were thrilled. Life resumed for David and Tammy.

They decided to try for a surrogate pregnancy and during the month of June Tammy received injections and medicine to boost egg production. She was so excited. The first week of July 2006 she returned for a routine post op exam at Emory. The tumor had returned and was larger than the first. It had only been a couple months. How could this be? The decision was made for radiation treatment with low dose chemo, but first she wanted to save her eggs for that future surrogate pregnancy. From that point on she always referred to her "kids in the freezer" with such pride and hope. Late summer through October she started her day at Emory for her radiation treatment. She had some bad affects of the radiation, but didn’t dwell on them and most who were with her on a daily basis knew nothing was different. Tammy tired easily, but insisted on coming to work everyday. She also continued to work at the emergency clinic during much of this time. She loved veterinary medicine. She was not going to give in to this disease. In early November 2006 she was admitted to Emory for intensive radiation treatment. She dreaded this time knowing she would be confined to a bed for 3-4 days with little interaction with people. Again, we thought we’d beaten "the beast."

December and January came and went and Tammy didn’t say much about herself and the outlook. Since the radiation treatments started, she had a continual weight loss so we were always offering her food. She was always gracious, but most of the time just couldn’t eat much.

In February 2007 a scan indicated the radiation had not been effective and the outlook was worse than ever. Dr. Horowitz told them she needed drastic surgery to remove what sounded to me like everything in her abdomen. We were all devastated. He told her she had to see a colleague of his at MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston before he would perform the surgery. The doctor in Houston was straight forward and told her not to have the surgery. It sounded like they were giving up on her. They returned home and another scan in April seemed to show a little improvement. There had been no treatment between the last two scans so we talked about the power of prayer. By May however, the doctors knew something had to be done and Tammy wanted to start chemotherapy in hopes that they could shrink the tumor in order to remove it. A biopsy revealed the beast had spread to the lymph nodes. Chemo was scheduled for early June. However, in late May Tammy came to work in severe pain and David took her to Emory. Her ureters were becoming blocked and surgery was done that evening to put in tubes to hold them open. From that day on, she had tubes draining from her back. In the beginning her kidneys had to be flushed several times a day. David showed me how to do this. She hated to ask for help or be of any trouble. I had to keep an eye on her and could pretty much tell when she needed to flush. It was painful, but she would feel relief when it was done. She kept saying she could never thank me enough and I finally asked her if she would do it for me and of course the answer was yes. I told her that her friends and family needed to be able to help and it would help us for her to give us that permission freely. She finally agreed, but of course, was always so appreciative of everyone.

Chemo was started in early June with treatments 3 days in a row, every three weeks. She would return to work after a day of recovery and then hit that brick wall the following week. She still made the effort to get to work. When we would try to convince her to save her strength, she would reply that her co-workers, pets and their owners were her strength. Working made her life normal. The love expressed by her friends and pet owners was incredible. Everyone wanted to be able to help her in any way and it truly boosted her morale.

During June and July she was admitted to Emory for infections and weakness three times. Each time she would rave about the good care she received and I know it was because each caregiver knew immediately what a special person she was.

Tammy continued to come to work even if it meant only seeing a few patients. We had a bed in her office and she would rest between appointments and mid-day. Her cancer was never a secret from anyone, but she would not be the one to bring it up unless it was related to a pet with cancer or a situation an owner would talk about. She was very open discussing her battle with anyone who asked. Many of our clients were shocked to hear she was ill because she was able to "hold it together" so well and her lab coat masked how thin she was getting.

One Monday night in early August Tammy called me to say she felt she could come to work the next day. She had been out of the hospital a little over a week. It was so difficult even coming down the stairs in her home and by the time we got to SweetApple she was exhausted. She spoke with a pet owner whom she dearly loved and then rested. I took her home a couple hours later. We both realized she just wasn’t up to it yet, but she made it to work. That was the last time. Although Tammy wanted to continue the chemo, the doctor said it wasn’t working and she wasn’t strong enough. She felt everyone was giving up on her and she wasn’t ready to let go.

Tammy’s faith in God was strong. Back in June one day we were talking while she rested and she asked me if I thought she was dying. She felt if God would cure her it would bring so many others to believe in Him. I told her I didn’t understand why she was going through so much. We kept saying that she just couldn’t get a break. She said maybe God was just waiting for His miracle to be even bigger.

As her health declined, her spirit stayed the same although she was in so much pain. She didn’t complain, but you could tell the degree of her pain. The pain medication decreased her appetite, but when in pain she couldn’t eat either. It was difficult to find a good medium to keep the weight from dropping off. It can be tough to visit someone so ill , but Tammy would be the one to keep the conversation light and focused on something else. When friends and family visited, she would love to hear what was going on in their lives, what was happening back at SweetApple and give her opinion on a treatment. She loved her job.

I never heard Tammy say "why me?" She was going to be the one to beat the odds. As her suffering increased many of us prayed for her release and the peace she so deserved. She would never let her animals suffer as she did, but she wanted to live.

Tammy was certainly an inspiration. She made a difference in the lives of so many. One of the hymns she wanted sung at her memorial service was "Pass It On." The love and generosity expressed toward her brought so many people together and reminded us that life is good. She lives on in the good gestures we each do for each other as we ‘pass it on.’

I miss you Tammy.

Margene Ford

SweetApple Animal Hospital

I found a link that will take you to this Hymn, " pass it on" if you would like to hear it, click on it.